Now is a strange time. Post-uni, I’ve taken on some much-appreciated freelance social media work, which is keeping me quite busy. I’m also working on getting things together for my next exhibition, LOOP.
Unfortunately my health has not been great, and my Ulcerative Colitis has been flaring up quite a lot. More than usual, in fact, which is Not A Good Thing. In the 15 or so years I’ve had this condition, I’ve certainly become more attuned to it, and better able to communicate the specifics of it. But in some ways, it gets harder.
Between the terrifying stuff going on in the country politically at the moment, and my ongoing physical problems, I am frequently in a state of extreme upset. Feeling- as I’m sure many artists atm do- somewhat useless. Why make art when our external and internal worlds are barely holding together?
I’ve been making work for some time now about, and using my body. I often wish I didn’t have a body- a want which is fairly common amongst those with long-term health conditions. It is so difficult to describe having a body which doesn’t do what you expect and -at worst- is attacking itself. My condition in particular- incurable, and somewhat mysterious, despite so much research into it being undertaken- is an immune system problem. My body literally attacks me, and apparently for no reason.
Psychologically, this is a bit of a headfuck. Making work that completely sidesteps needing a body to run it, might be far in the distance, but it’s certainly something I can keep researching. Might it be possible to make a creative ‘archive’ of the body- wherein I can collect and categorise movements and physicality, during times when I am well, and just Save them for later?
Next weekend, I have been lucky enough to have been given a place on a 3-day workshop- ‘Attack Of The 50ft Woman: Reimagining Scale, Ambition and Access for Monsters in Performance, through the lens of Feminist Sci-Fi‘ led by the performance artist Lauren Barri Holstein.
I’m really hoping to bring some of these ideas to the workshop, whilst also having a bit of time away in a new place too…